i'm signing you up for texting rehab
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Randomize