The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize