i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
