i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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