Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Randomize
