There is no way he is gay with that hair.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
