So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Randomize
