im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
