They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
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He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
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So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
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