She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
