yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
i just google imaged poop.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Randomize
