watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
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