So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
