Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
