Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
