You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
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