I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize
