Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
