therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
So many bounce houses so little time
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
