is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Randomize
