he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Sext me about skeletons
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
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