Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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