You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
She told me I should be a condom model.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
