its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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