I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Randomize
