Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
