The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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