i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
only you would photoshop your dick
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Randomize