im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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