I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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