I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
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i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
15 Times “Flight of the Conchords” Made You Feel Better About Being a Twenty-Something
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway