I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Come share oat with me in your robe
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
