I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
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