So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
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