A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Randomize