my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
