My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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