I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
