omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
