I can't watch pbs sober anymore
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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