Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Randomize