Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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