You're so nebulous sometimes
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
