it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
