you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
