now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
