I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Just fell off a train. Bad.
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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