What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize
