we have officially lost it.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
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