hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
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If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
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he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.